


Unmake the Monster

by Experiment1994



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Bad Parenting, Captain America: The Winter Soldier, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Guilt, I'm Bad At Tagging, Protective Bucky Barnes, Rape/Non-con Elements, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-19
Updated: 2018-03-20
Packaged: 2018-12-31 10:43:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 6
Words: 19,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12130740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Experiment1994/pseuds/Experiment1994
Summary: Anna Peters wanted to forget, James Barnes only ever wanted to remember. They were isolated from society, beaten down and abused to the point of breaking. They were forced together and they formed a bond that ultimately saved them from disaster.





	1. Chapter 1

Chapter One: The Daughter

 

The large gilded bank loomed heavily above making the teen feel so very small. She thought she was going to the doctor that's what her parents had told her, maybe they had to make a stop at an eerily creepy bank that they had never been to before. She followed her crisply dressed father as he walked through the foyer like he owned the place. He had picked her up from school insisting he take her to her appointment. She thought they would go to the tellers once inside, that's what her mother does when she goes to the bank, but her father steers her off to the side down a long hallway where the only thing to see are cold walls and even colder armored guards. The guards nod at her father and give her knowing looks. Instantly she’s uncomfortable. Together, father and daughter reach the end of the hall and enter what appears to be a service elevator, the older man using an identification number to open and close the doors. The young girl can feel a chill as the lift takes them underground. Curiosity and fear swell in her chest. Hesitantly she closes her eyes softly reaching out to her father searching for her purpose here.

He whips his eyes onto hers feeling the probing fingers in his mind. “What did I tell you?” He snapped angrily. His hand wrapping around her bicep with bruising force shaking her roughly.

“Shit sorry. I just, I want to know why I'm here.” She stammered out instantly regretting using her gift.

“Well I can guarantee it isn't bring your daughter to work day.” the man said cruelly. The girl stared confusedly, she had thought her father worked for the government, not a weird bunker like bank. “If you ever attempt to use your little demon powers on me again you will wish you had never been born.” He spat at her turning to face the doors once more.

“I already do.” She muttered so low her father couldn't hear, her voice filled with venom and resentment. Ever since she was fourteen and started showing signs of her powers her father had changed. He became colder and distant as though trying to sever whatever bond the two had. He forbade her from ever using her powers on himself and her mother, to the point of extreme physical punishment. As a result she learned to repress her gift early on, four years later she strained heavily whenever she tried to use it.

The elevator doors finally opened up and she was pushed out into a hallway very much the opposite of the clean brightly lit bank interior. These halls were made of concrete with flickering ominous fluorescent lights. Screaming could be heard in the distance a raw agonizing scream that rattled the girls very soul. She wanted it to stop she wanted to be far away from that sound and this place. She could almost feel the pain of the man as his cries echoed down the hall, imprinting itself into the girl’s ears.

An armed guard walked toward her father. He was young and not unattractive but he gave of a menacing aura that had the girl attempting to step slightly behind her father but his grip on her arm pulled her back to the front. “Agent Peters.” The guard said in recognition before eyeing the girl with an odd glint in his gaze that left her squirming.

“Agent Rumlow.” responded her father.

“This the enhanced?” the strange man, Agent Rumlow, asked nodding at the girl. Her father's grip tightened as he shook his head in affirmation.

“Is the asset causing problems?” her father asked as the three of them began to walk down the long hallway, the two men flanking her as though she were a prisoner.

“No more than usual sir.”

The further they walked the louder the screams seemed. The girl wanted to reach out to her father for comfort but she knew there would be none. How could her father work here? How could he so willingly and nonchalantly listen to the agonized screams of a tortured man? How could he bring her here? Before she even realized what was happening she was being ushered into what appeared to be an examination room complete with a two way mirror. The guard stood by the door hand casually resting on his holstered gun.

The girl looked around the room in a mounting panic. There were medical tools some familiar some foreign laying on a tray next to an examination table. Everything was sterile and everything was bright. The girl looked into the mirror, hoping no one was looking back, but knowing someone was. She looked at herself, small, still in her gym clothes from school. Her blonde hair pulled up into a messy ponytail, her chocolate eyes wide with fear. She stood surrounded by white walls and pain filled screams. “Dad, what is this place?”

“This, Anna, is The Vault, you’re about to become very familiar with it.”

 

Agent Charles Peters sat in a chair by the door, while his daughter paced, refusing to go near the examination table. She knew this wasn’t normal, she knew something was wrong. She knew it the moment she went downstairs for breakfast that morning. Her mother, always kind but never overly affectionate, went above and beyond for breakfast showering her with new clothes and gadgets. Her father who would normally brush her off insisted that he drive her to school and pick her up. Anna was worried, she wanted to believe that it was because it was her 18th birthday, but now she knows that isn’t the full story and she was very, very worried. Anna Peters could sense the two men coming before they walked in the door. If she had known what was in store for her she would have run right then and there. 

“Ah, Agent Peters, Agent Rumlow, The Asset is ready for you, I assure you, Dr. Collins and I can handle a teenage girl.” Anna turned to look at the pair as they stood before her father. The unnamed man who spoke was shorter but all the more sinister for it. He wore a foreboding smirk that left one feeling open and vulnerable no matter how many walls were put between you. Dr. Collins was a grandfatherly looking man with a balding head and dead eyes that could swallow you if you looked too deeply in them. 

“Very well Dr. Shultz.” Anna heard her father speak to the Doctor before turning to his only child. “Anna, you will listen to Dr. Shultz and Dr. Collins. You will do as they say, or your screams will join the Asset’s.” Anna’s eyes widened in shock as she stared horrified at her father not believing this was happening. With that Agents Peters and Rumlow left the examination room. 

“Now Miss Peters if you would disrobe and lay on the table so that I may begin with the physical examination.” Dr. Collins spoke, his voice monotone and unattached.

“What? Are thou kidding me? No I’m not taking anything off.” Anna yelled crossing her arms and backing herself into the far wall. 

“Tut tut. That is not how your father told you to behave, young lady. You wouldn’t want us to make good on his threats now would you?” Dr. Shultz said his slight German accent coming through as he taunted her stepping closer in an almost predatory fashion. “Do not make us use force.” 

“I'm not doing anything, I don't know you. I'm not getting on that table and I'm sure as shit not stripping down in front of you old farts.” She spoke confidently but as Anna looked around the room desperately for an escape her mind was reeling with panic and adrenaline. Seeing a taser and a gun strapped to the waist of each doctor. Why would doctors need to be armed, what is this place? The blonde swallowed thickly eyes rapidly moving about the room, only seeing one door, the one she came through. “Do you have a changing curtain and a hospital gown or some shit?” She asked nervously trying to bide her time still looking around frantically.

“There won’t be a need,” Dr. Collins spoke as he filled a syringe eyeing the dosage carefully, “we’ll all see everything eventually.” Anna looked back and forth between Collin’s uninterested and bored face to Shultzs gleeful grin.  The young girl’s heart pounded in fear.

“You can’t do this, you could get your medical license taken away for shit like this.” She argued holding her fists tightly at her sides.

“I haven’t had an operable license in almost two decades.” Collins droned wiping down all his tools.

“I’m considered dead, I don’t need a license.” Shultz shrugged. “Enough chit chat mädchen, strip or we will use force.”

“I don’t believe you.” Anna tried to sound strong but her voice wavered. She doesn’t know who these people are and she certainly wasn’t going to let them do whatever it is they were planning. With a sudden burst of stupidity Anna lunged forward and tackled Dr. Shultz to the ground quickly scrambling off of him and toward the door before he could use his taser. Ripping the door open she came face to face with a tall angry man with a military style buzz cut dressed in fatigues and loaded down with an intimidating array of weaponry. 

“Ah Agent Willcox, just in time. Apparently she is not as compliant as her parents would have us believe.” Dr. Shultz said picking himself off of the floor and dusting himself off. The man pushed Anna back as she shook with fear, adrenaline pumping through her veins. There was no way out, she could take on the old doctors but no way she could take down this obviously well trained and solidly built man. “Now, Miss Peters I will say this once more, strip down for your examination or we shall have Agent Willcox do it for you.” Dr. Shultz spoke. Anna looked to Dr. Collins hoping maybe he would be her out, but he merely looked inconvenienced as he pulled on his latex gloves. Anna looked to Agent Willcox and he smirked down at her. As a last ditch effort, the young blonde slapped her hand on Agent Willcox’s forehead and closed her eyes the world around her going dark as she delved into the mind of the soldier. 

Images flashed through her mind moving so fast she thought she might be sick. Stolen files, bullets flying across a desert, conference rooms, assassinations, a muzzled man with long hair and dead eyes. Her parents flashed through his mind and she dug and dug finding their purpose. Hydra. Sleeper cells, Winter Soldier, S.H.I.E.L.D. an onslaught of information yet nothing concrete nothing helpful. She needed to hone in on her powers. 

Suddenly agony ripped through her head feeling as though her skull was being split in two a mans screams could be heard on the ground next to her mingling with her own. It took several long moments to feel the crushing weight of a knee pushing into her stomach and the cold metal of gun being held against her brow.

“What is the meaning of this?” A familiar voice rang throughout the once sterile room. “Agent Jarrod I demand you release my daughter at once.” A sharply dressed woman in her mid forties strode into the room with fire in her eyes. Jarrod rolled off of the enhanced and moved to flank Agent Willcox who was struggling to his feet with the assistance of two more agents. 

“Mom?” Anna asked weakly from the tiled floor.

“Oh darling, I’m so sorry. They were supposed to wait for me. I was held up at S.H.I.E.L.D.”  The woman spoke soothingly to her teenage daughter pushing her hair from her face cradling the young girl’s head to her chest. 

“Alice, I see you have arrived.” With a scowl, the mother stood to face her husband. Charles Peters stood with Agent Rumlow and Alexander Pierce.

“I specifically requested that a female doctor be brought in. You assured me that my daughter would be taken care of.” Alice said standing between the men in the room and her daughter who dizzily sat on the floor. 

“And she is, Alice. She’s being taken care of just like any other asset of Hydra.” Charles spoke condescendingly to his wife. Anna pulled herself up standing behind her mother for protection.

“Charles have you no decency left? This is your child.” Alice shouted angrily. 

“She’s property of Hydra now.” He sounded so nonchalant, sending a sideways glance at his daughter. “You knew the stakes when you agreed to this.”

“You-” Alice Peters made to spit fire, but was interrupted by the unsure voice of her daughter.

“Mom, you agreed to this?” Anna asked shaking heavily. “You both agreed to this?” The blonde teen backed away from her mother slowly bumping into the table of surgical tools the feeling of betrayal spreading through her like wildfire. “Mom, you’re a Nazi?” It sounded ridiculous when saying it outloud, the teen almost wanted to laugh. Her father she had no problem believing, but her mother? No. She had learned about Hydra last semester in World History, the Nazi scientists. Her parents gave her to Hydra to do experiments on her.

“Darling it’s not what you think. This is for the greater good. You can help the world.” Her mother insisted reaching toward her. Anna put her hand down on the table slicing her finger on something, but too afraid to look down. “Look into my memories darling. You won’t get in trouble. Just take a look, I’ll show you.” 

“No, they’ll grab me while I’m out.”

“No one will touch you dear, just look.” Anna nodded slowly wanting to trust her mother, but she didn’t move. She didn't need contact to see her mother, she was far too familiar with her parents. Closing her eyes she breached her mother’s conscious. Her mother was pushing a specific memory forward . A memory of when Anna was fourteen and first met Alexander Pierce. He had come over for dinner. Father said it was about work, but it was more about her. Pierce had come to assess her. Had her parents sign a contract. But Anna wasn’t interested in the memories her mother wanted to show her. She wanted to know the secrets. It was like trying to watch thousands of movies and read hundreds of books all at once. Information just kept flying at her in waves.

Anna searched deep down when her parents were young they were on a team together, with the Winter Soldier. They were assassins. They were murderers. Her mother became pregnant, her father became the Handler for the Asset. They did terrible things and came home to live in suburbia with her. They cheated and lied and stole for their supposed greater good. Anna searched and searched through her mother’s mind, and then she heard it. The screams. The screams of her parent’s victims as they were tortured and killed. Soon red was the only color Anna could see it consumed her it buried her. It was suffocating. Panic bloomed in her chest once more and she fought her way out of her mother’s subconscious. She fought to find the light the good anything to get the images out of her head, to get out of her mother’s mind. 

With a gasp Anna pried her eyes open to see her mother holding her head kneeling on the cold white tile. 

“ANNA WHAT DID YOU DO?” Her father screamed marching to her mother’s side. Anna couldn’t respond she could only retch to the side vomiting her half digested school lunch onto the pristine white floor, before sinking down next to it. The smell mixing with the metallic scent of blood from a nosebleed she didn’t realize she had. 

“Sedate her and get on with the physical examination.” Pierce spoke, before turning on his heel and strutting out of the room. Anna didn’t have the strength to fight anyone off. She merely faded out as Dr. Collins stuck a needle in her neck. 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two: The Noncompliance

 

Months came and went, Anna spent her days at the Vault, her nights locked in her room in her parent’s home. She was pulled from school. The internet, cell phones, mail, and even carrier pigeon were all inaccessible to the once social teen. They had warned her if she spoke to anyone attempted to contact a single person from her old life they would be eliminated. The only people who ever spoke to her were her mother, Dr. Shultz, and her tutor, a butch of a woman who went by Lehrer and nothing more. Lehrer was as cold and cruel as the rest of Hydra, and had the disciplinary measures of a Catholic Nun, smacking the young blonde with a ruler whenever she answered incorrectly. The girl would go home with welts across her knuckles and sometimes her back if she butchered some foreign words whilst learning many different languages.

 

Some days she didn’t spend time with Lehrer and she wished she was. Instead she would be spending time with the doctors. Collins would test her physically to the point of insanity, and still Anna would rather spend time with the soulless him than with his sadistic counterpart, Dr. Shultz. One her days with Dr. Shultz she would be led to an interrogation room, she would be hooked up to a machine that monitored her brainwaves. There would always be someone sitting at the table waiting for her, she rarely saw the same person twice. Dr. Shultz would be on the hidden side of the two way mirror watching. She would never know the person but she would be told to delve into their mind and find their secrets find their fantasies. She would be forced to pry into the minds of her unsuspecting victims and answer a questionnaire about their lives.

At first Anna would make up the answers not wanting to use her powers, she didn’t want to give them what they wanted, but she quickly learned that death came to those whose answers didn’t match her own.

She felt sick with guilt pale and weak unable to eat or sleep terrified of complying, and horrified of not. Shultz would look on gleefully as she ripped apart the minds of the men and women brought before her, feeling what they felt. Every session she could feel her powers growing and she wept. She wept in fear and desperation longing for it all to end. Her only consolation was that by breaking their minds she would be saving their lives. Without truth without transparency they would all perish because of her.

One day a month before her nineteenth birthday, Anna was led into the interrogation room by agents Willcox and Jarrod. She glanced down at the list of questions she was given curiously. This wasn’t the standard loyalty interrogation, or a debriefing this person had wronged Hydra. A man was sitting across the table badly bruised, dried blood crusted across his face and rage in his eyes. He was strapped down to the chair unlike all of her other victims. He rattled his chains as she stepped into the room causing Anna to jump back into Jarrod’s chest.

The prisoner barred his bloody teeth in a grin before speaking in russian, “Oni posylayut etu malen'kuyu shlyukhu, chtoby slomat' menya.” ( _ They send this little whore to break me _ .) He laughed before spitting a mouthful of blood onto the floor at her feet. “Yesli vasha sobaka ne mozhet etogo sdelat', chto zastavlyayet vas dumat', chto mozhete?”  _ (if your dog can't do it what makes you think you can? _ ) Anna didn’t know much but she knew enough to be insulted. She sat down glaring at the beaten man, he merely smirked not intimidated at all. He turned to the two guards who were hooking Anna up to the machines in the room. “U menya yest' pervyy raund, i vy sleduyete?” ( _ Do I get the first round and you follow?) _

Without anymore hesitation Anna dove in finding the meaning behind his foreign words she pressed harder and faster each layer of memories that she tore through further infuriating her she ripped apart the murders and found the rapes and unspeakable crimes and something snapped in her mind. She went lethal no longer paying mind to the man. She could hear him screaming as she dug her way through his mind finding the answers Hydra wanted. She wanted to be away from this disgusting creature. She felt his joy as he ruined the innocence of many women and children, she felt his bloodlust as he slit throats and fired shots that ended lives, she felt her own rage taking over an all consuming cloud of red hot rage surged through her and into the man's subconscious. And then suddenly it was all dark. She could no longer see memories, or feel emotion. There was nothing but dark silence. Opening her eyes she looked up at Yuri Popov, for that was his name, and instead of seeing the gleaming eyes of a sadist she saw dead eyes that stared at nothing, and a busted lip glossed over by drool. With a realization of absolute horror she stood from her seat and retreated so quickly she tripped over the wires still attached to her, falling to her back. That did not stop her she continued her retreat pulling at the wires and scrambling back until she hit the wall. All the while never taking her eyes off of the drooling mass of flesh that was once a member of the Russian Mafia, a killer, a raper, an unholy beast, and she had reduced him to a vegetable. She felt her lunch churning in her stomach. How could she have done this? No matter that past transgressions of the man, no one deserved that, did they? How could she have snuffed the life out of this man’s eyes no matter how cruel he was? Was she any better than this monster? The man’s eyes, dead as they may be never strayed from Anna’s face, as though they were taunting her. Forcing her to realize what she has done and what she has become.

Footsteps made their way across the small room. Anna tore her stinging eyes away from the unresponsive man to look at Willcox as he pulled his weapon out of his holster and started poking Popov with it.

“Fuck man I think he’s fucking brain dead.” Willcox said waving his hand in front of the Russian’s face.

“Shit really?” Jarrod asked moving over to pinch Popov’s broken nose. There was no response. “Damn she really fucked this guy up.” The two agents looked to the traumatized girl on the floor.

“It seems young Miss Peters has progressed much more than I thought. I think it’s time to introduce her to the dog.” Dr. Shultz’s voice floated over Anna like mustard gas, poisoning her little by little. “Call this in, have Mr. Popov dealt with.” Jarrod and Shultz stepped into the hall while Willcox kept an eye on the still comatose teenager and the vegetative Russian.

It wasn’t long before a ‘cleaning crew’ came in and carted Popov off to God knows where. They undid his chains and placed him on a gurney like table and wheeled him out of the room not saying a word to anyone. They just loaded him out like garbage. Like they were emptying the waste basket, or flushing the toilet. Anna wasn't sure why that bothered her so much. Once they had left Shultz clapped his hands together and smiled.

“Best get her up and moving. They’re waiting for us.”

Willcox and Jarrod stepped forward and pulled Anna to her feet. Dr. Shultz led them all down the hallway that never seemed to end. Anna could barely move, a tightness in her chest and pressure behind her eyes, her body wanted her to cry, but she couldn’t. Crying was a weakness, and crying over the enemy was damn near punishable.

All too soon the group of four made their way into a new room, a bank vault, armed men and scientists filled the room. Anna immediately saw her father and Agent Rumlow, the pair were flanking a seated man. This man Anna had only seen in the minds of her victims. His long hair like a curtain to hide his face. Stubble peppering his jaw in an almost permanent 5 o’clock shadow. He sat shirtless, scars smattering his chest and shoulder where it attached to the bionic arm that made him so famous. The red Star on his shoulder signifying his time in Russia. Anna knew this man without ever having met him before this was the Winter Soldier. As she looked him over,she noticed that he was undeniably attractive, dark and dangerous forcing a blush to flutter across her cheeks. His steel blue irises, lacking any and all warmth they might have once had, locked on her own. Her already slowed movements stopped all together at the intensity of his gaze, her heart beat stuttering. Willcox and Jarrod gripped her arms tighter and pushed her into a chair in front of the Winter Soldier. Anna swallowed thickly, nervously taking her eyes off of the Fist of Hydra to look to her father.

“Dad?” She questioned.

“This’ll be just like the interrogation rooms Anna. Just see what you can find.” Her father said calmly, his eyes trained on the Asset.

“Please I don’t-” Anna began to protest remembering not even an hour ago how she wiped a man from existence.  Anna looked around the room, everyone with a weapon had their hands on it.

“You will, this is non negotiable. If you don’t you’ll feel a hell of a lot worse when I’m done with you.” Nervously Anna nodded at her father and looked back into the empty eyes of the assassin in front of her. She did her best to calm her breathing, closing her eyes, inhaling through her nose, exhaling through her mouth. Slowly she let her mind reach out, she couldn’t dive in like she did with the others, this man was a weapon, this man would not hesitate to hurt her.

When she looked into his mind her heart stopped, it was dark and quiet, just like Yuri Popov’s last moments, she thought she had ruined the Soldier as well, they would kill her if she had. But as her panic rose she soon realized that she had done nothing, there was nothing just left to damage. She went deeper hoping this wasn’t the fate of this poor man. Slowly a memory appeared, it was broken faded like an old newspaper clipping. In it someone died. The further in the more she found just clips and snippets of missions and assassinations, but there were no emotions, this man felt nothing. Further and further Anna looked. So little memories none of them full, everything was full of static like it was a bad connection, until suddenly all she sees is World War II a man named Zola a fall from a train, Red Skull, a small girl yelling for ‘James’. The memories cut out as her eyes open and breathing stops. She looks into the suddenly fire filled eyes of the Winter Soldier as his metal hand wraps around her throat.

“GET HIM OFF HER!” yells echo throughout the Vault as they attempt to pull the two apart. But the soldier’s grip is too firm.

“Who are you?” He asks as a gun is held to his head. 

“SOLDIER! RELEASE HER!” Agent Peters shouted. Hesitantly the Winter Soldier releases her throat and sits down in the chair once more. Anna coughs and hunches over as air rushes back into her lungs. Dizzily she sits on the floor trying to get her bearings. All the guns are trained on the soldier as he stares her down. Quickly Anna scrambles away not realizing how close she was. Willcox and Jarrod help her to her feet and pull her behind them.

“Take the girl for debriefing and send her home. Put the Asset back in cryo, we won’t need him for a while.” The voice of Alexander Pierce travels quickly through the almost silent room. Anna looked toward the barred door not realizing he had followed them in. A chorus of ‘Yes sir’s echoed throughout the room. Anna was lead to a familiar room where she struggled with her sore throat, stuttering quietly through the pain, telling what she saw in Yuri’s mind as well as the snippets of the Winter Soldier. James, he had been called. Anna didn’t mention the little girl or his name, that wasn’t necessary, he could keep that. Hopefully he could keep something. After the debrief Anna was lead to Dr. Collins, thankfully Dr. Shultz sat this one out. She was given a once over and told to stay silent for a few days while she healed, no extra effort.

As it turns out silence rest and minimal effort meant she got to stay home for a week. Relatively alone with Willcox and Jarrod watching the house while her parents were at work. It was a relief, sure she wasn’t allowed on the computer or cable or phone, but she did have an impressive DVD collection that she was steadily making her way through. On the third day of her shut in the back door unexpectedly opened halfway through the Princess Bride. Anna shrugged it off assuming one of her guards had to use the bathroom or something, so when a hand clamped over her mouth she was more than shocked. Another hand reached out and turned the volume up exceedingly loud on the television. Screaming she flailed her arms about but they were quickly caught.

“Annie, sweetheart, how are you feeling?” A quiet voice whispered in her ear. Anna’s hands and mouth were released and the young woman turned to see her mother abnormally dressed in jeans and a sweatshirt.

“Ya know, most people announce themselves by saying ‘hi.” Anna croaked from her spot on the couch, reaching for the remote, but her mother’s assassin like reflexes grabbed her wrist.

“Care to scoot over for your mother? I figured you could use the company.”

“Uh, okay weirdo.” Anna made to move over but her mother’s grip didn’t falter and kept her still. Alice Peters looked carefully from window to window. Glaring down every shadow, she pulled Anna up and pushed her toward the stairs. “What? I thought we were gonna watch the movie?” Anna asked staring at her mother. With a roll of her eyes Alice Peters pointed to her head in a silent invitation. Anna reached out softly brushing against her mother’s mind.

_ “Pack only what you need, we’re leaving. Don’t speak another word aloud they’re listening.”  _ Anna’s eyes widened.

“I’m gonna go change into some sweatpants, I-uh, I’ll be right back.” Anna stuttered looking around her seemingly empty house before running up the stairs. She tore through her room throwing all her socks and underwear in a backpack then desperately crammed three pairs of jeans and as many shirts as she could manage. Then running to the bathroom she shoved toiletries into all the side pockets until it looked like the bag could literally take no more. “ _ Mom?”  _ she reached out tentatively, “ _ are they watching the house?”  _ there was a long pause before her mother responded.

_ “They were.” _

“ _ Well that sounded shady as fuck.” _

_ “Watch your language young lady.” _

_ “Whatever Nazi mom.” _

Coming back to reality Anna ran down the stairs to where her mother was waiting. Anna made to go through the front door but her mother held her back. Carefully Anna followed her mother to the back of the house into the laundry room. Mother turned to her daughter and pulled the hood of her jacket over her head brushing her hand down her cheek lovingly before covering her own head. The older blonde then opened the window and slipped out with more grace than a woman half her age. Anna’s eyes widened seeing her mother in action. The young girl made to follow her mother and landed flat on her face in the garden bed below. Brushing off the mulch Anna followed her mother through the back yard and into the tree line that separated their subdivision from another. In the tree line her mother picked up a bag and shouldered it. Anna briefly wondered how long her mother had been planning this. The two blondes ran out of the tree line toward a black four door sedan. Her mother unlocked the strange car and climbed in the driver’s seat. Throwing her bag into the back. Anna copied her movements and soon the car was peeling out of the neighborhood.

“Mom, can we talk now?” Anna asked quietly. With a nod of confirmation and eyes never leaving the road Alice relented. “Where are we going?” She didn’t answer for a long while just kept watching the road ahead and the mirrors, looking for any sign of a tail. Eventually she sighed.

“Away, far away where they can’t hurt you any more.” Her mother’s voice cracked causing Anna to stare in shocked horror. “Oh my sweet baby, if I had known all their plans for you, your father’s plans, Pierce’s, I would have stolen you away a long long time ago. I’m so sorry, I’m so so sorry.”  She turned to her daughter tears welling up in her normally passive, expressionless eyes. “I hope some day, you can forgive me.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anna and her mother have been on the run for a long time. For two years luck has been on their side, luck ran out.

Chapter three: The Consequence

Two years and eight safe houses later, Alice and Anna became Karen and Emily Sanders while on the run from Hydra. Birthdays came and went in different countries as they traveled the world as they searched for a safe haven. Always just out of reach for their enemies. The mother and daughter duo found refuge in Sweden, as they were able to blend into throng of blondes that inhabited the country. Alice found work in a bank, her new career allowed her to keep an eye on things. Anna functioned well as a librarian in one of the many local libraries, her thirst for knowledge nearly unquenchable. Setting up a life in a small two bedroom cottage, the pair remained out of sight and out of mind. Things had been going well for the women and they’d settled into their new environment quite easily. It was comfortable almost too comfortable, in fact.

“Did you hear that?” Alice inquired, her well-trained ears were severely out of practice. The older woman’s hands stilled, halfway through plaiting her daughter’s hair into a fishbone braid.

“What?” Anna looked up from her bowl of ice cream in confusion from her seat in front of her mother. She had been engrossed in a textbook, which laid across her pajama clad thighs. Alice raised her hand signaling for the 21-year-old to be quiet. Listening closer, Anna did as her mother bid her. A single twig chimed, hauntingly in her ears causing the younger woman’s brows to furrow and her head to snap in the direction of the front door.

Alice’s face darkened as she reached underneath the table and pulled out a glock, “Get the lights.”

Jumping up, Anna flipped the switch on the wall nearby, cloaking them in darkness. She felt the cold metal of the handgun as her mother slid it into her palm. Wrapping her fingers around the grip, flicked off the safety ready to act if need be.

“Remember what I taught you.” Her mother’s voice was a whisper obscured in the blackout.

Anna nodded, despite the lack of light she knew her mother could sense it. Her own voice trembled as she mumbled, “Mom, I love you.”

“I love you too, Annie.” 

The shattering sound of a window breaking assaulted their ears as smoke began to billow into the room. Straightaway and without hesitation, the blondes moved to duck behind the couch, pulling their shirts over their faces as they hid. With her mind, Anna strained as she reached out to locate the intruders, but she was out of practice. She hadn’t used her powers in so long it was hard to shake the rust off. 

A floorboard creaked closeby causing Alice fire off a shot that ended with a thud. Round after round, her mother shot down their attackers. Although she was blinded by smoke and slowed by age, Alice never missed her targets. Squeezing her eyes shut, Anna attempted to reached out once more, feeling for those who would take her away. Her consciousness expanded, slowly unfolding as it grazed over her mother first, then one, two... No, ten Hydra agents. Her father was here, and then there was darkness. Anna’s eyes snapped open as she felt the void.

With a deep, quiet breath, Anna informed her mother, lowly, “Dad’s here, and he brought his dog.”

“God help us.” Alice hissed in desperation as her trigger clicked as she discarded her empty weapon to the floor before taking the gun out of Anna’s hands and knocking two more agents to the floor. Two more rounds rang out above her, Anna expected to hear another thud, but the ominous sound of metal clanging assaulted her ears. They didn’t have another moment to think before the couch was lifted above their heads and thrown across the cabin. 

The Winter Soldier stood in it’s place, glaring down at them from over his muzzle before he pushed Alice aside and ripping the firearm from her hand. The assassin, then, turned his attention to Anna, reaching out he grasped her upper arm with his metal hand and jerked her to her feet.

“NO!” The cry resonated along with the crack of a bullet. 

The shot whizzed by Anna’s head before embedding itself into the flesh shoulder of the Winter Soldier. 

With the metallic arm still wrapped around Anna, he used his natural hand to unholster his own gun before turning the barrel towards her mother. In an act of desperation, Anna spun in the soldier’s arm and placed her hand upon his cheek. Diving into his subconscious, barreling through the nothingness searching for something, anything to stop that trigger.

_ A brunette woman in a pretty dress and a frilly apron stood with her hands on her hips and a little girl tugging on her skirt. “James Buchanan Barnes, you better watch that mouth of yours or one day it’s gonna get you licked and I won’t have no sympathy for ya.” _

_ “Ah, ma, no one’s gonna put a shine on this face, ain’t nobody got the guts.” The woman smiled fondly at her son. _

_ “Well you better go along and find Stevie before someone puts a shine on his little face.” _

_ “Yes ma’am.”  _ The vision faded and Anna opened her eyes. James was looking at her, not the Winter Soldier, but James. Human eyes stared into her with so much raw emotion it almost broke her heart.

“Please, don’t hurt my mother.” Anna pleaded her hands resting on his fatigues.

“I won’t.” He almost promised, faintly sounding confused, like he had no idea why he would ever agree to that. Nevertheless, he lowered his weapon and stepped away, letting go of Anna altogether. The young woman ran to her mother’s side the two held each other closely.

“Excellent.” 

The lights flipped on. Anna looked to the doorway and saw her father in tactical gear holstering his gun. “Well done Asset.” The rest of the STRIKE team filed into the small living room surrounding them. Agent Peters pulled a radio out of his pocket. “We have them apprehended.” He spoke confidently.

“Them? Only one prisoner is required.” The line was staticy but there was no doubt behind the meaning.

“Sir?” Peters questioned, his voice wavering in uncertainty.

“Eliminate former agent Peters, and bring the girl back to the Vault. Do I make myself clear?” There was a long pregnant pause as Charles stared down his wife and child. Anna shook in her mother’s sturdy arms. No emotion crossed the faces of her parents as they held eye contact, communicating in ways only they knew.

“Agent Peters-” the radio crackled.

“I hear you sir.” Her father responded. Charles looked to The Winter Soldier. “Separate them.”

“NO!” Anna screamed and kicked reaching for her mother pulling at her arms and clothes desperately clinging to the woman in an attempt to delay the inevitable. Her mother however merely released her never breaking eye contact with her father.

“Remember what you promised me, Charles, the day she was born. Let it fill you with guilt and destroy you.” Alice spoke as her husband stepped forward. Anna screamed and kicked as the Asset pulled her away trying to pull her out of the room, but Anna fought, she wouldn’t leave her mother. Turning to face her child Alice offered a sad smile. “Anna,” girl quieted but continued to struggle in the bruising grip of her captor. “I love you, darling.”

“I love you too.” STRIKE members pushed Alice Peters to her knees.

“Goodbye Alice.” Her father whispered, and then it was over. The flash of a muzzle the spray of blood and a body hit the floor. Anna slumped against the Winter Soldier’s a gut wrenching sob like scream tore from her throat. She didn’t care that a group of armed men witnessed her defeat, she didn’t care that she was being taken away, back into the clutches of Hydra, she just didn’t care. Rage and depression fought violently inside of her, fighting for dominance and leaving her drained. She wanted to sleep for ever, but everytime her eyes closed all she could see was her mother’s head snapping backwards upon impact. She was being pulled toward the door, but her body wouldn’t move. After a moment she was flung over the metal shoulder of the Asset and walked out the door. She couldn’t fight back even if she had wanted to. There was no point, they would take her down. She couldn’t fight them.

They filed out of the house one by one standing in formation around the perimeter. “It is done.” Anna could hear her father’s voice.

“Bring her home.”

“Yes sir.” As a unit the Strike team turned and walked through the trees. Anna felt heat on her face and she looked up to see the small cottage beginning to burn flames licking at the interior of the living room window. Another sob bubbled out of her. She felt a hand on the back of her calf the thumb moved hesitantly in an almost soothing motion. The shock of the gesture stalled her tears. The Winter Soldier followed orders, but James Barnes was still in there. James Barnes tried to pull her from the room to keep her from seeing her mother’s murder. James Barnes attempted to comfort her. Anna Peters was the only one who could find James Barnes.

He kept his flesh hand on her, gentle in contrast to the cold metal of his left hand. Anchoring not only her but himself as well, with his hand on her he felt a purpose like he had never experienced before, it calmed him to a point it almost scared him. The Winter Soldier gripped the small blonde woman tighter, he couldn’t remember, but he knew he had felt this way before. He wanted to protect the small blonde and he didn’t know why. 

The team followed Agent Peters through the trees toward a dirt road. Quickly and silently they loaded into three black vans. Anna was pushed in the back of the middle van the loss of warmth from the Asset was more shocking than being tossed into the back, that brought her more fear than she needed she couldn’t afford to get attached to Hydra’s attack dog, no matter the abnormal level of humanity hidden beneath the beast. Handcuffs were slapped on her wrists and she was pulled up on the bench between Rumlow and the Winter Soldier. As soon as she was was situated the van revved to life and took off. Anna grew numb on her trip not noticing when the van left the dirt road and onto pavement. Not caring when they stopped at an airstrip and loaded her into a government issued jet. She didn’t care that they strapped her in like a toddler. She was numb to the world, until her father knelt before her. Anna had held back her tears as much as she could once they left the flaming cabin. She concentrated so much on not feeling the pain of her mother’s demise, that she forgot about the hollow rage coursing through her veins. That rage surged forward as her father made eye contact with her. He was speaking but all she could hear was blood rushing in her ears spurred on by white hot rage.

“Fuck you.” She knew she cut her father off mid sentence. “Fuck Hydra, and fuck your greater good.” mustering up all she could, Anna reeled back and spit in her father’s face. Red creeped up his neck and covered his face as he wiped the saliva off his cheek. With the other hand he smacked her, her neck popping, and lip busting upon impact. Nose flaring in anger Anna closed her eyes and pushed into her father’s subconscious no mercy to be had.

She saw her mother’s death from the other end of the gun. In shock Anna pulled away, to afraid to keep looking. The Strike Team was ready, weapons trained on her. Her father pulled himself up from the floor before backhanding her a second time. 

“Agent Rumlow,” Her father said wiping at a nosebleed.

“Yes Sir.” Rumlow stepped forward, Anna sent a glare his way spitting out a mouthful of blood.

“When we make it back to base make sure you break her. With any means necessary.”

“With pleasure sir.” Rumlow responded.

“Knock her out I don’t want any more setbacks.” Agent Peters said turning and walking away. The last thing Anna Peters saw was the burning blue eyes of the Winter Soldier as they stared at her in an almost panicked intensity. Fear slowly crept into her mind before she was enveloped in darkness.

  
  


Hours later the young woman began to stir awake, she lay naked, spread eagle, on an operating table. Straps across her forehead, chest, hips, arms and legs prevented her from moving she could feel the skin of her temple throb. Slowly she became aware of her current state and began to panic, thrashing at her bonds.

“Ah, you are awake.” Dr. Collin’s stepped into view and began poking and prodding all over her body. Her skin flushed red. She felt violated as Collin’s gloved fingers felt all over her giving her a far too thorough examination.

“What did you do to me?” Anna asked voice cracking, expecting the worst.

“I installed a chip, almost like what they put in shock collars. You use your powers when you’re not supposed to, someone hits a button and bzz. It’s simple really.” Collins said monotonously as he wiped down his tools with precision.

“Can I get up?” She asked quietly. “Can I get dressed?” She asked thankful that Collins was the only one in the room, although he was creepy and unnerving, he never came off as a pervert.

“Well, I’m done with you, but I don’t think the others are.” He said packing all the tools away and stepping away. The door opened and soft footsteps could be heard entering. “Agent, I was just about to send for you, she’s awake. Just be sure to clean up after you’re finished, I just had this place in order before you filthy animals came in here.” Anna could hear the shuffling of Dr. Collins’ footsteps as he left, she wanted to call out, but he wouldn’t stay, he wouldn’t save her from whatever was coming.

“Well, well, well, aren’t you a pretty picture, all tied up and just waiting for me.” It had been over two years but Anna could recognize Agent Willcox’s voice floating toward her. She desperately wished her wrists were free so she could cover herself. Soon his face was hovering right above her’s and she began to struggle, pulling desperately at her restraints.

“Tut, tut, tut. Can’t have that now can we?” Like a predator Willcox stalked around the table, tightening each strap trapping her that much more securely to the table, all the while running his fingers up and down her sides. Anna’s breath became more and more erratic as he continued to prowl around the table, her skin crawling in the wake of his touch. With one hand his fingers trailed down where no man had touched before. With the other he pulled out a remote and held it between his thumb and fore finger.

“Better behave, I’m not the only one with your remote.” He smirked using the edge of the remote to trace the side of her face, letting her know it’s purpose. “Rumlow wanted to be first you know, because he has seniority, but Jarrod and I ultimately won out considering we had to put up with your ass for a fucking year. But don’t worry baby, we’ll go nice and easy.” He said beginning to unbuckle his fatigues.

“Please don’t.”

“Don’t start begging now, I was hoping for a little witty banter.”

“It’s only banter if we were both witty.” She spat.   
“That’s hurtful sweetheart, but I’ll let you get a few licks in before I give it to you.”

“You look more like a receiver than a giver.” Anna glared no longer concerned for her modesty, it was already gone.

“You going to give it to me baby?” he asked leaning in too close for comfort, a disgusting smiek plastered to his face.

“No, but I’m sure Agent Jarrod would.” The sound of her cheek being struck by the back of his hand was almost lost to the sound of raucous laughter coming from behind the two way mirror.

“Fucking bitch.” Willcox spat before turning toward the mirror. “Fucking shut up, fucking cunts.” He yelled flipping the mirror the bird. Slowly turning back to Anna he began unbuttoning his belt.

“I was gonna go easy on you, now you just lost that privilege.”

“Aren’t you worried about all of them seeing you tiny prick? Or have you already showed them?” Another resounding smack and a chorus of laughter filled the room. Anna allowed herself a smirk, but it was short lived as he pulled out a combat knife. He twirled it in his hand before jamming it into her thigh. A scream of shock and agony filled the room echoing off the pristine white walls. Her back arching as much as it could whilst being strapped down she shook and desperately tried to reach her leg. Hot wet tears threatened to spill as she desperately reached for some relief.

“Not so sassy now are you princess. Don’t worry I didn’t hit anything important.” He ripped the knife out blood pulsing out of the wound onto the floor, forcing another cry past her lips. “Now be good, you have a line of people waiting their turn.” He grinned maliciously at her before climbing on top of her and pushing his pants down to his knees.

She didn’t think that she would ever be thankful for a knife wound, but the pain in her right leg distracted her from the pain between her legs as Willcox rutted against her. She wanted it to be over she wanted to pass out. She wanted a lot of things. Mostly she wanted to end the life of Agent Philip Willcox. She fought back a sob as he finished and slid off of her. He was gone, but she could still feel his weight resting on top of her, when she closed her eyes she could see nothing but the manic gleam in his eye as he looked down at her quivering form.

“You ready for round two sweet heart?” She wanted to fight back, she wanted to kill him, kill all of them, but she just lay there. Battered, broken and bruised, she lay still as he undid the straps holding her down. Roughly he pulled her off the table and bent her over it so she was facing the two way mirror. 

“Really wish I could pull your hair bitch but looks like we’ll have to wait a while for that.”

Anna thought she was broken before, but as she locked eyes with herself in the mirror she realized how much lower she was capable of sinking. Tears of defeat streamed down her face as she stared at the top of her head that was once covered long strands of soft honey blonde hair. Her shaved head reflected the blinding white lights off the White Room. A sob bubbled out of her as she watched Willcox smile down at her as he violated her from behind. 

Hours later, Anna lay numb and pale, bleeding on top of the exam table bite marks and cuts littering her body. Her lower body had long ago lost feeling. her leg wound had a ripped shirt tied around it stemming the flow helping to keep her conscious. She felt nothing, because she was nothing. She was a toy, a warm hole, that was what they had told her. It’s what they made her say. They had made her fight, they made her beg. They made her into nothing and they laughed. She wondered if this is what her father meant when he told them to break her. She wondered how long she would need to suffer before they felt she was shattered beyond repair. The door opened, but she didn’t move, she didn’t care enough to even try to cover herself.

“Oh my, they did quite a number on you Mädchen.” Dr. Shultz stepped into the room toeing around the blood stains. “Dr. Collins will not be pleased with the mess.” He chuckled dryly. He looked over the girl curled up on the table. “You are too emotional Mädchen, these things would not befall you if you only listen and comply.” He paused for a moment moving to stand directly in her line of sight. “Are you ready to comply?” He asked stooping to look at the tear stained face of the young woman. She didn’t speak, she only stared. She thought about saying yes. If only to end the pain, but then she remembered Yuri Popov. He was evil, he was a monster, but even he knew Hydra was wrong. She remembered her guilt at decimating his mind, if she complied she would be forced to do worse to far more innocent people. She would be pushed into the minds of countless people forcing them to relive their memories, forced to experience their memories for herself. All the pain and anger, agony and fear. Could she live with herself? Could she learn to detach from the emotions of others, and emotions of her own. Could she sacrifice her conscience and innocent lives to avoid more torture at the hands of Hydra? She had to believe she could. She was stubborn enough for it. With all the effort she had in her she breathed out her response.

“Fuck you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who commented and who gave me kudos. You're the best.


	4. The Redemption

Chapter Four: The Redemption

It was almost a normal day for Anna Peters. She was woken up by a random guard, it was never the same one they didn’t want her to form any relations. Some would come early and violate her, when she would fight them, a vain attempt at saving herself they would pull out the Remote. They would tease her with it fingering the button sending small jolts of electricity coursing through her brain. Eventually she gave up the fight and lay still while they had their fun, it was only physical she would tell herself. Her mind was her home, it was her weapon and her sanctuary, they could take her body but they would never take her mind. 

She had taught herself to hide within her mind. Her powers would wrap her in a protective blanket keeping away the pain and torture. It protected her. However well her powers worked to disassociate her with her trauma they would never erase that first day. It would never take away the memory of her mother passing or her father’s betrayal. Or of Willcox and the others violating her in ways she never dreamed possible. Her powers were growing, she was learning. But she would never be able to forget.

All those agents came at different times but they all made sure they were punctual when they escorted her to the White Room where she would be left to wait for Dr. Collins. The elderly man was so devoid of emotion that it was almost easy for Anna to endure his torture. He would force her into the shower and check on her never ending wounds, then he would test her microchip that kept her in line. Shocking her in different intervals seeing how she would react. He would test her physically pushing her to see what her powers could protect her from. To see how much pain her body could handle before her mind broke. But her mind was strong, it was the only strength she possessed.

There were some days when she was close to breaking. On those days Dr. Shultz was right there to pick at the pieces of her mind. He kept saying that stress and trauma enhance one’s natural gifts. She kept calling him a crock. He would force her in interrogations. Sometimes with innocents that were in the wrong place at the wrong time. She was getting better at hiding herself in her victim’s minds, and hiding her emotions. 

After the blood sweat and hidden tears she would then meet with Lehrer to continue her education. Hydra would not stand for incompetence. She learned of the world around her, a world she might not see ever again. History, languages, science, math, and literature. This was the only time she felt calm. Lehrer was, cruel, and never sympathized but she was her only source of knowledge, the only thing that was healthy for her.

At the end of her day she was led back to her cell by random armed guards, they would taunt her, beat her, occasionally rape her. She felt disconnected she figured it was what Hydra wanted, her to step away from her feelings. But she held onto one feeling, anger. Every day they would ask if she was ready to comply each time she chose to spite them. Even though she was relatively dead inside she still had enough of herself to tell them to fuck off. Every day seemed to be the same forcing her to lose track of reality, and time all together. However there was something about this night that was different, this night many months after the death of her mother, something changed. 

She lay on her cot immobile as her sweatpants were ripped off of her. She closed her eyes waiting for the inevitable, breathing deeply trying to find a calmness within her mind ready for the pain, but it never happened. The door opened stalling her would be rapist, the two occupants of the room looked to the lit doorway. 

“What is the meaning of this?” Anna blinked away the pain at the sudden light and focused in on her father’s silhouette. 

“Agent Peters, I was ordered-”

“Get the fuck out of here.” The unnamed Hydra agent scrambled out of her cell as fast as he could. Anna pulled her pants back on and stared at her father.  “How long has this been happening Anna?” He asked sternly. His fists clenched tightly at his sides.

“Since you told them to break me. I think you used the phrase ‘whatever means necessary.’ she answered with a hint of venom in her otherwise monotonous tone. Her father stared at her, eyes flickering in concentration. Anna arched a single brow. With a huff Charles left her cell sliding the lock in place leaving her to her nightmares. 

“Wake up.” It was earlier than normal when she was roused from her fitful slumber. She didn't want to open her eyes to see her attacker so she lay still awaiting the inevitable. “Anna Grace Peters get out of bed this instant.” Her eyes snapped open to see her father's grumpy face.

“Why are you here?” He didn't answer he merely rolled his eyes before pulling her up to her feet.

“Shoes.” he ordered. Confused she slipped her black and white tennis shoes on and wrapped herself in the black sweats that made up her prison uniform. She was barely ready before  he pulled her out of her cell and down the hallway. With his brisk pace it wasn't long before they reached their destination. 

“Clear the room.” Her father barked forcefully leaving no room to argue. Everyone filled out with the exception of the two of them and the Winter Soldier who sat trapped in his personal torture chair. Charles left his daughter's side only for a moment to shut and lock the door. He then pulled a chair up and sat her down in front of the soldier. 

He stooped down staring at the Asset looking him over. “Soldier, do you remember this girl?” the Asset remained frozen in place only moving his eyes to briefly glance at his handler before turning his empty eyes back on Anna.

“No.” The soldier answered.

“You will.” Her father stood and looked between the impassive face of the Asset and the mildly confused one of his daughter's. “Anna i need you to push memories of yourself into his mind.” 

“The fuck for?” She asked leaning away. Her father rolled his eyes in annoyance. 

“Just fucking do it Anna. For the love of God just do what you're fucking told For once in your life.”

“Shit, so fucking hostile.” She droned.

“Anna! I don't have the patience to deal with you. Just fucking do it.” he yelled getting angrier by the second.

“Fine.” She spat looking back to the Winter Soldier. She quickly found his emptiness, the darkness and she clung to it wishing she could have that level of emptiness, but knowing she was condemned to feel forever. Slowly she thought of her own memories, she tried to find something happy something warm, but it was hard. It was hard to see through these last few months of hell. It was hard to look past her mother's murder. So she didn't. She chose her trauma. She remembered that first night back at The Vault, strapped down to that cold metal table, beaten and raped. How once they removed her bonds they made her watch her own reflection in the mirror knowing full well the group of animalistic males on the other side were watching in rapt entertainment. She tried desperately to push the images and the pain from that night out of her mind. She could hear the Asset pull at his restraints. She could hear her father whispering in his ear. She pushed her memories into the assets mind hoping that he would take them away, that the emptiness inside him would swallow them up and they would be lost. But she knew they would stay with her forever. They are a part of her. As she pushed them deeper she could feel his anger and discomfort. He could feel everything she had felt, he could see it all, the phantom of all her pain coursing through his body. Anna softened when she felt his anger on her behalf. She started to pull away when she heard her father's whispers through The Asset’s head,

“ _ Her safety is your mission. You will remember her. You will protect her.”  _ Her father's orders shocked her forcing her out of the soldier's mind all together. She stared stunned as her father whispered his mantra over and over again as the Winter Soldier stared her down. His eyes brimming with a hollow fire looking deep within her. After a few moments the older man stood up and looked to his only child.

“Why are you doing this?” Anna asked legitimately confused over her father's actions. 

“I have done terrible things in my life, but nothing compares to what I have done to you. I plan to fix that.”

* * *

For the next year and a half Anna was present with her father while the Winter Soldier was out of cryo. All of his time not spent on missions was centered around Anna Peters as her father attempted to rewrite his internal programming. Her father would have her push images of herself upon him. Images of her being hurt, of her pain, at the same time she would look through his mind finding more and more of who he was. Silently James Barnes and Anna Peters learned all they  could learn about each other, a mental and emotional bond forming between the two. While her father stood repeating his secret orders to the Winter Soldier, Anna was learning about James Barnes. Two separate entities shoved inside one body. The human and the machine, Sergeant and Assassin. Anna knew that she could never erase the Winter Soldier from James’ mind, just like she couldn’t erase her own trauma, but she could push the assassin back and give James a fighting chance.

Progress was made with her father and the Winter Soldier but her torment didn’t end. They would only wait until her father left for the day before they started to strip away what was left of her willpower and humanity. They would taunt her with the remote that controlled her mind chip, sometimes fingering the button so they could watch her writhe in agony as electricity shot through her forcing her muscles to contract against her will. She wanted to fight it but she would scream every time.

One of these times she lay naked on the cold tile of the White Room thrashing violently, her screams echoing off the walls like they had so many times before. The shocks stopped she could hear the laughter of the three agents standing above her Willcox, fingering the button zapping her a few more times. The laughter was cut short as the door slammed open. Before any of them could move Agent Donnelly dropped to the ground eyes staring wide and neck broken in half. Willcox and Forrest began shouting and drawing their weapons. But they were no match for the Winter Soldier. Their bullets ricocheted off the metal arm of the assassin as he stalked forward the only weapons on him were his own hands. Swiftly he disarmed them crushing their weapons in his hand like they were made of glass moving faster than Anna thought possible. Forrest’s shoulder was ripped out of socket and his knee kicked back like a broken flamingo. Willcox received a punch from the soldier’s left arm, the following cracks signifying the broken bones. Forrest desperately reached for his radio, but his hand and the communicator were crushed under the boot of the brunette. Willcox stood and attempted to attack her saviour from behind with his combat knife, but he was no match for the Fist of Hydra. Spinning swiftly the Winter Soldier grabbed Willcox’s arm snapping it in two then twisting him around disarming him and stabbing him in the thigh.

“Ne volnuysya, ya ne udaril nichego vazhnogo _. _ ” Anna had learned enough Russian to understand him. It was what Willcox had told her when he stabbed her almost two years ago. The young blonde ran her fingers over the scar on her thigh before looking up at the soldier, his fiery eyes were on her. He looked at the small nude woman who still sat on the cold bloody tile and something burned inside of him. He gazed at her for an uncomfortably long time before walking to Agent Willcox and ripping off the man’s clothes until he lay as naked as the girl before him, his pain filled cries falling on deaf ears. Slowly the Winter Soldier handed her Willcox’s blood stained clothes making eye contact that neither unsettled her or calmed her.

“Odevat'sya.” Get dressed he said . She knew that, she had been told that enough. Slowly she pulled the shirt out of the pile and slipped it over her head. The Winter Soldier seemed satisfied and walked over to his two remaining victims. 

“Gori v adu.” he spoke before slitting their throats. The two agents looked to Anna as they lay bleeding on the floor, and she felt herself smirk. Shaking her head she stood to pull on the far too large cargo pants, and looked away not wanting to find joy at death but no other emotion would come forward. She was glad they were dead. Three less bodies to violate her. She felt a hand on her shoulder and looked to her right. James, at least she thought it was James, was staring back at her, for just a moment concern lighting up his steely blue gaze. Soon the training took over and he pulled her out of the room and down the hallway. He took her to her cell and shut the door, sealing them both inside. He took the small metal chair and sat down facing the door his hand still on Willcox’s combat knife. He glanced over at her seeing her stand staring at him in shock, in clothes that swallowed her whole .

“Spat'.” He commanded pointing to her cot. Slowly she crawled in and pulled the thin blanket over her. She watched his profile, but did not sleep as he commanded. She watched him tense as Agents began running back and forth through the halls. A red light began flashing. It took them a while before they opened her cell door. Rumlow rushed in gun trained on the assassin who sat two feet from her bed. The assassin that had protected her. Slowly her cell was filled with armed men. The Asset rose from his seated position. Anna stood as well taking a step toward the assassin her hand skimming lightly over the back of his black fatigues. He glanced at her out of the corner of his eyes, humanity leaking into the cerulean depths.  An agent who she did not know the name of but who knew her intimately grabbed her wrist pulling her away from the Soldier. There was a cry of pain and a loud crack right before the hilt of the combat knife stuck out of the agent’s chest, his hand slipping from her wrist. It was quickly replaced by a much more gentle metallic grip. 

“Restrain him.” Rumlow shouted. “Get him back in the chair.” The winter Soldier made eye contact with the blonde once more before being led out of the room, his hand slipping soundlessly from hers. Rumlow looked between the pair before turning to the remaining men in the room. “You get this cleaned up, and you call Agent Peters, Director Pierce will want a word.” Rumlow said before grabbing Anna and pulling her out the door.  Anna was lead down the hallway into what appeared to be a conference room. Before the door shut behind her she could hear the chair start and the muffled screams of her saviour. She was pushed into a chair where she would wait. The room was empty save for herself Rumlow and the furniture, until she noticed the Remote within arms reach of Rumlow sitting deceptively innocent on the table. The two sat in silence waiting, Rumlow letting his fingers brush up against the Remote every now and then in silent warning. An unholy scream echoed throughout the base chilling Anna to the very core. Wide eyed the blonde looked to Rumlow. Worry filled her, knowing that James was in the chair. Rumlow smirked at her. 

“He might protect you now, but once this is over, he’ll kill you in a second just like the rest of us.” Anna stared at the agent in disbelief. She reached out with her mind, finding James in a matter of seconds, she knew him so well, physical distance could no longer separate them. It was like a lightning storm was ravaging his mind. Anna searched trying to find the center of his focus, and when she did she almost cried. Through the pain the image he tried to remember was her face. It wasn’t his own memory but one she had given him. One where she was happy, and safe and unaware. Before she had been ruined and damaged beyond repair. Using all her strength she pushed her mind out encompassing his own. The lightning disappeared from his own damaged mind, but it came upon her own with a bruising force. A shocked scream pushed past her lips from the sheer intensity of the pain coursing through her mind. Tears leaked out of her eyes knowing James had been subjected to this for over 70 years.

_ ‘Anna.’  _ His voice resonated through her mind as she concentrated. He had never said her name before. He sounded scared and wounded. He knew she was there and he tried to push her out. He tried to save her from the pain, wanted to save her from the pain. She fought until it was too much succumbing to the darkness.

Anna’s eyes flew open the metallic taste of blood on her lips and stinging sensation on her cheek. Agent Rumlow stood from where he was crouched above her pulling her up from the floor and tossing her in a chair. She looked up to see Her father, his face passive showing no emotion, and Alexander Pierce. 

“Well now that we’re all paying attention, I think we can begin.” Pierce said before narrowing his focus to Charles Peters. “I know what you did, Charles. I want you to know I understand, we ask a lot of you. Kill your wife, torture your daughter, watch her get raped. I get it, it’s a lot. It’s understandable that it makes you a little uncomfortable, but it was necessary. She needed to be detached from her emotions, for her to truly be useful to the cause. So I can forgive your unease. The problem though is that you have used your position to attempt to reprogram Hydra’s number one Asset. You had him kill Agents, good agents, in order to protect her. I can’t have that Charles. I can not forgive that.” He paused as if waiting for the man to speak. When it became apparent that the other man was not going to speak. Pierce shook his head and spoke to Rumlow “Make it clean, he’s been good to us, for the most part.” He turned to Anna and stared her down. “Make sure you watch. It’ll help you.” Anna turned quickly to see Rumlow standing behind her father pistol in one hand and the Remote in the other. 

“I’m sorry to do this Sir.” Rumlow stated, no emotion in his voice.

“You’re a good soldier Brock.” Her father responded with the same tone.

“Thank you sir.” Rumlow said switching off the safety.

Charles then turned his eyes to his daughter. “Anna, I hope you can forgive me one day.”  And then the trigger was pulled and her father’s body slumped the same expressionless face forever plastered in her mind.

“It’s such a shame really five dead in less than a day, all here. I think it’s a new record.” Pierce said standing and adjusting his suit. “Make sure this is cleaned up.” Anna didn’t think she would feel lost at her father’s passing, but at Pierce’s nonchalance Anna saw red, and she lunged. She tackled the older man to the ground and hit him in the face three times before Rumlow struck her. Her body dropping, dead weight trapping Pierce to the floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for my kudos and my reviews, I love everyone of you.


	5. The Escape

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're up to Captain America: Winter Soldier guys, are you excited? I am.

Chapter Five: The Escape

Hydra’s new routine of torturing her in front of the restrained asset became fruitless in their eyes. No matter how many times they wiped his memory, the Winter Soldier somehow always remembered, and he would fight for her. Whatever her father had done worked. It was his redemption as many more agents lost their lives at the hands of the Winter Soldier. The number toll increased to the point, they dared not touch her unless the Fist was in cryo. Talk of killing her had come of a few times, but they feared the repercussions of what might happen if the soldier woke up to find her missing. Often times he would become violent if he didn’t see her. Anna Peters was also deemed too important by their superiors; she was necessary for the greater good and the new world they wanted to create.

Even when the Winter Soldier was sent out on missions, men kept a wide berth which allowed Anna time to heal. The only people who dared touch her were Dr. Collins and Dr. Schultz, although they refrained from physically hurting her anymore. Now she had a protector, someone who succeeded where her parents had failed. The fact that his hands were as blood stained as the rest of them didn’t matter to her. It didn’t matter that he was Hydra’s attack dog. None of that mattered because she knew there was a human side to him underneath the damage Hydra had caused. James Barnes endured despite what had been done to him. He hadn’t chosen this life, but he would survive it.

There were times when Anna was still forced to sift through the minds of Hydra’s prisoners as well as lower level henchman. She would look for secrets and any useful information being withheld from mission reports. Within these sessions, she learned of what all was going on in the world outside this prison. Tony Stark had fashioned himself into Iron Man. An Asgardian, called Thor, had shown up in New Mexico. The long-lost Captain America had been recovered by S.H.I.E.L.D. and had been successfully been thawed. There had also been an alien invasion in New York. The world as she knew it was simultaneously crashing and rebuilding with the emergence of each new powerful being. It was a relief to know there were still heroes in the world and maybe one day they might come for her. Until that day came, she would stay with the Winter Soldier.

One afternoon the man stormed into her room as she reread some old textbooks she’d held onto during her captivity. His appearance wasn’t abnormal. Thanks to her father’s conditioning, he was compelled to check in on her to verify her safety. What was bizarre were his actions as he barricaded the door upon entry. Shooting to her feet, she tossed the book aside as alarm flared in her mind. Pounding from the other side of the door answered her unvoiced question as someone demanded access. 

The Winter Soldier thrust his body against the door, holding it shut with his bionic arm as he looked to her and demanded, “I need you to read my mind. Tell me who I am.”

“What?” Anna frowned as her brows creased with confusion, not daring to take her eyes off her lethal protector.

_ “Who is Bucky?” _

Anna didn't need to look in his mind for the answer he sought.

“You are.” She began, slowly as he looked at her with fear and uncertainty in his eyes before she continued, “Your given name is James Buchanan Barnes, your friends called you Bucky.”

“There was man on the bridge…” He trailed off. “Who is the man on the bridge? He knew me. I know him?” 

For the first time, the man looked frightened as he struggled to piece together the broken images in his mind. Anna found the fresh memory he spoke of, it was still there they hadn’t been able to wipe it from him yet. The Winter Soldier had been fighting a tall, blonde, powerful man with a red, white, and blue shield. Through the eyes of James, she saw the man’s face morph into an expression that could only be described as shock as he uttered only one simple word.  _ ‘Bucky.’ _

Pulling away, Anna returned her attention to the physical world and towards the super solider as he struggled to protect them, “That was Captain America, his name is Steve he was your best friend growing up.”

“He’s too tall to be Steve.”  The assassin frowned, shaking his head in denial.

“You- You’re remembering, aren’t you?” She inquired as a small smile pulled at her lips. A smile only he saw.

“I think so.” He nodded, confusion drawing his eyebrows together. 

Anna reached for him, running her fingers over the leather of his gloved hand. He looked at her, delicately, holding her gaze his eyes held a myriad of emotions. Strong emotions which terrified him. He looked as if there was more he wanted to say, but he never got the chance as a Strike team forced their way into her cell.

“Against the wall bitch.” Their commander ordered, harshly once they filed into the room.

Not wanting to cause a scene, Anna attempted to comply but James chose to fight. Reaching out, she attempted to assure him as he gripped her arms. She was his lifeline and the key to finding his humanity. 

“It’ll be okay. We’ll make it.” Her words of assurance calmed him and he allowed them to pull him out of her cell.

Slowly, a grin crept it’s way onto her face. She almost laughed from the relief she felt. If she knew anything it’s that Captain America was a symbol for justice and no man of justice would let their best friend rot in the clutches of Hydra. Captain America was going to find them. He was going to come for Bucky.

* * *

 

A few days later all hell broke loose. Anna had been sitting in her room reading her old Calculus textbook when her chip sent an electric volt so intense she saw stars before seizing on top of her mattress. Two agents came into her cell and zip tied her wrists together before throwing a bag over her head which disoriented her further. They forced her out of her room, quickly, not giving her a chance to calm down from the shock or put on a sweatshirt and shoes. 

The concrete floor felt cold underneath her socked feet as she was ushered down the hallway. Her mind felt fuzzy as her brain began to throb against her skull, replacing the muscle spasms from earlier. Anna’s captors pulled them to a halt and she barely comprehended the dinging sound of an elevator door and the disorienting feeling of the elevator ascending through its shaft. It was only a short ride before she was being pushed out of the compartment and out onto a loading dock.

Despite her circumstances, a bubble of joy swelled in her chest as she felt a warm breeze caress her skin. Anna felt overjoyed as her mind registered her body was outside. It was the first time she’d been anywhere other than within Hydra’s various rooms since her mother had died.   

Faint screams of terror floated on the wind after Anna had overcome the initial over-stimulation from her new surroundings. Immediately, she yearned to find out what was causing such fear and pain but the aftershock of the electric currents pulsed in her head. If only she hadn’t been stunned, perhaps she could help in some way.

The heat of the sun on her back felt like fire on her skin but she relished the feeling as she attempted to soak it all in despite the pain. However, her delight was short-lived as the agents threw her into a van. As soon as the doors slammed shut, the comforting presence of the sun and wind disappeared.  Anna heard the front doors open and close, followed by the engine revving up and the vehicle propel forward causing her to slump to her side from the force.

Defeat hung like a heavy cloud above her as she realized what was going on. They were moving her. No one would be able to find her now. She would merely become another lost soul, she couldn’t even contact the Winter Soldier not until she could focus again, but by then she wouldn’t know where she was. She felt an unforgiving sting behind her eyes.

“Dammit, Anna, why do you have to be such a baby?” She asked herself, bitterly as she willed the tears away.

Suddenly, tires screeched as the driver slammed down on the breaks causing Anna to fly forward and crack her head on the metal panel, worsening her headache. Two gunshots fired from somewhere outside, shattering the glass. An adrenaline rush sent Anna's body into a panic as her heartbeat raced in her ears causing her breathing to increase which made the already claustrophobic bag become hot and unbearable. 

A moment later, one of the doors opened and shut in succession before the van roared back to life speeding off and away from whatever scene they’d left behind; slinging Anna to the other end of the van. In her restrained state, she resigned herself to the journey whoever was now driving was taking her on. Hours passed and the van never slowed down. Eventually, the sounds of the engine and the road noise lulled Anna to sleep. Unfortunately for her, the nightmares never allowed her to sleep for long.

* * *

 

When Anna woke up, her body was drenched in a cold sweat but her wrists had been freed and the bag removed from her head. Slowly, her eyes adjusted to the darkness as the moon illuminated the silhouette of a man looming over her. Out of instinct, Anna kicked still reeling from her nightmare. Images of the White Room all too fresh in her mind. Cold metal coiled around her ankle, restraining her and she sighed in relief. 

The sound of a thud fell on her ears as something was placed against the sole of her foot. It took her a moment to realize it was a shoe. He had gotten her shoes and was checking the size, fondness swelled in her.  He had come back for her, he had stolen her away from Hydra, and he brought her shoes. Her body warmed as a small smile slipping across her face, she shook that feeling away. The Winter Soldier tossed a plastic bag at her. 

“Get changed.” He made to move away but she latched onto his arm. The man flinched and stared at he hand gripping the forearm of his his flesh and blood limb. Awkwardly, she withdrew her hand and cleared her throat as she inquired,

“What's going on? There was so much screaming.”

“Pierce is dead. S.H.I.E.L.D. fell. Hydra files were released. If we want to get out we need to hurry get dressed.” He slammed the door shut before she could ask another question. Curiously, she reached out to his mind but she pulled back when a fist shaped dent appeared in the side of the van. 

“Sorry.” She yelped. 

Hastily, she emptied the bag and changed in the dark not knowing when or how he managed to get her clean clothes and shoes and at this point not really caring either. As quickly as she could she climbed out of the van to follow him.

Glancing around, Anna took note of their surroundings while the Winter Soldier pulled out a gas tank. Tall trees surrounded them, their shadows concealing their presence. The lack of light pollution in the night sky was enough to tell her they were far away from the city, somewhere out in the country where it would allow them sometime to regroup.

The smell of gas caused Anna’s nose to wrinkle and she turned to watch James empty the tank in within the van where her prison sweats remained. Sparks flickered in the dark as the man ignited a lighter which he also threw into the back. The van began to glow from the inside out as flames began to spread, rapidly consuming any evidence they had been there.  

The assassin grabbed Anna's arm, pulling her toward a silver truck with tinted windows. Opening the driver's side door, he pushed her inside before following suit. Anna was forced to crawl across the center console to the passengers side. Not waiting for her to situate herself, he thrust the key into the ignition and tore down a dirt road. 

After a while they made it back to a paved highway. The silence was deafening in the small cab until a loud grumble rolled through her stomach. Amidst all the chaos, Anna hadn’t realized she was hungry until her body demanded her to eat.

“At your feet.” He informed her, not removing his focus from the road. 

Anna casted him a confused glance before she looked down at the floorboards and found two plastic bags. Pulling one into her lap, her lips stretched into the smile only he saw, the one that warmed him without even meaning to. There was an expression of pure glee on her face as she peered into its contents. Judging by the assortment of items, James had most likely gone into a convenient store and had gotten a little bit of everything. There were Froot Loops and little debbies, candy, and chips. Anna was thrilled, it had been years since she’d seen junk food. The other bag had Gatorade and water shoved in it. Wasting no more time, Anna began shoveling food into her face. 

Two hours later, the Winter Soldier’s left hand gripped the wheel while his right threaded through Anna's shoulder length blonde tresses as the girl regurgitated all of the sugary junk food she’d so greedily devoured. Hunched over one of the plastic bags, she groaned as the contents of her stomach poured out of her. She heaved a few more times before she wiped her mouth with the corner of a cheeto bag before tying up her sick bag. James released her hair, his flesh hand ghosting over her neck and shoulder. Anna felt comforted for the first time in a long time, unconsciously, leaning into his touch. She was unprepared for the coldness left in his wake when he pulled away.  

“So should I call you Bucky?” She asked, clearing her throat as she attempted to defuse the sudden tension building between them.

“No.”

“James then?” When he didn't respond, she looked over at him. There was a subtle dip of his head as he nodded, still not quite sure of himself. 

“Thank you, James. For everything.” He was silent, he wouldn’t speak for a long time. Anna felt an uncomfortable awkwardness building within her. Finally, after what seemed like forever, James spoke up. 

“Why are you thanking me?” He asked genuinely confused, looking over at her.

She offered him a sad smile, “Because you saved me.”

“I condemned you, really. I’m the one who found you with your mother.” Bucky shook his head, gripping the steering wheel tighter.

“You didn’t kill my mother, you tried to turn me away when my father killed her.” She reminded him, “You protect me.” 

The man scoffed, rolling his eyes in exasperation unable to see whatever it was she saw in him.

“It’s true...You’re the only man that hasn’t hurt me since I was brought to Hydra. You’re the only one who didn’t, who didn’t…” Anna paused, swallowing, roughly as her throat became raw and dry from the influx of unpleasant memories. “You’re the only one who didn’t try to ruin me.” 

Stalwart determination was evident in his face and voice as he promised, darkly,  “If I see any of them ever again, I promise you, I will end them.” 

There was a twisted feeling of comfort and safety Anna felt in his words. Never would she be able to fully forget the trauma of her past but with him, she could escape a future full of it. The super soldier would protect her. No one would hurt her again. No one would beat her, no one would force themselves on her. She shook her head and rolled down her window to escape the dark thoughts, they were starting over, they would run away and figure out how to be human again. 

Slowly, the sun began to rise over the horizon, casting a warm glow over Anna as she stared off into the distance out the passenger side window. James watched as a small smile wavered on her face. A calming feeling washed over him as he looked at her and realized her presence stilled the internal storm within his mind. 

Turning back to face the road, he berated himself. Of course, he would be calmed by her, all his memories were ones that she had given him. Without her, James Barnes would’ve remained a person lost in time and locked away in the deep recesses of his mind. Without her he would be soulless, mindless, a dog, a weapon. She held the power to heal him.

“Hold the fucking phone! You’re taking me back to D.C.?” She hissed, turning sharply in her seat. Her once serene face contorted into a look of hatred and betrayal as she spat in a weak attempt to sound strong, “I thought you were going to save me?”

“No one will touch you. No one will ever touch you again… But there’s just something I have to see.” He informed her with a guilty look on his face.

Silently, she reached out with her mind trying to see his intent. When he felt the caress of her mind against his own, the man tensed and snarled, “Don’t use your powers on me. For once I want my mind to be my own.” 

His words halted her. Anna couldn’t fault him for wanting her out. She knew how long he’d been at the mercy of others, now he was finally free. It was only right that his mind and body were both free. 

Huffing, she folded her arms over her chest despite knowing she was behaving like a petulant child,  “I guess I just have to take your word for it. I can’t exactly fight you or outrun you.” 

She looked back out the window watching the sunrise once more. Her hair twirling in lazy curls as the wind rushed through it. Oranges and pinks illuminated her face casting an ethereal glow on her. He was almost lost in the way she looked, set afire by the light from the sunrise. “Why did you drive all the way out of D.C. just to come right back?”

“I had to lose the tail.” She sat straight up staring at him in shock.

“We were being followed?” She frowned before her voice began to stutter as she twisted in her seat to peer out the window behind them, “But I thought Hydra was exposed?” 

Anna was thankful to find only empty road behind them.

“Exposed, not dead. They’ll be looking for us.” He reminded her, glancing at the woman out of the corner of his eye as she leaned back in her seat and contemplated his words. A new feeling of anxiety filling her. She had to remind herself she would be safe. They wouldn’t get to her, not with James here. 

* * *

 

Standing alone in an alley, hidden off in a corner Anna huddled against the brick wall her presence concealed by the shadows casted off the buildings on either side as waited for James to return. The sound of cars and pedestrians filtered like white noise in her ears as she listened for anyone approaching her. Her body was still riddled with anxiety at the thought Hydra was still out there looking for them. Would this nightmare ever end? Was it even possible for her to find peace?

Anna didn’t have the opportunity to contemplate her future any further as James ducked into the alley, strutting over to her with a hoodie in one hand and food in the other. Without hesitation, Anna pulled the hoodie over head, slipping her arms through the baggy sleeves before she reached for the sack of food. Remembering her junk food binge, she smartly decided to take small, slow bites of her breakfast burrito. Glancing up at James, she watched him as his eyes scanned up and down the alley. He had been far more on edge since they ditched the car on the outskirts of the city. 

In fact, he hadn’t truly calmed since their escape. He’d been in flight or fight mode for so long, Anna wondered, briefly, when was the last time she’d seen him eat anything. As absurd as it sounded, she couldn’t recall a time when she’d ever seen him consume anything. 

“Have you eaten?”

Her words caused his eyes to snap down to her as his brow furrowed in confusion, “What?” 

“Have you eaten? You know like at all?” She inquired as she voiced her concerns for his physical health, “ I don’t think I’ve ever seen you eat anything.”

“Not hungry.” The man rolled his eyes at his companion before turning his attention back to the entrance of the alley.

“Are you sure? I’ll split the burrito with you.” Anna insisted, offering up the wrap for the man to take but James shook his head and softly, nudged it away.

Instead, he reached out and pulled the hood over her head, tucking away a few of her wild curls away to more effectively hide her mane as he assured her, “I’ll be fine.”

His flesh hand lingered on the lip of the hoodie, it’s presence, simultaneously, calming and quickening the young girl’s heart. For a few moments, the pair seemed to be lost in each other’s presence as they stared into each other’s eyes both of them looking for something, but unsure of what. James was the one snap out of it first, taking a few steps away from her to distance himself as he pushed the baseball cap to cover his face, “Come on, they should be busy enough by now.” 

Before she knew it, the super soldier strode out of the alley and turned to make his way down the sidewalk towards their destination. Anna dashed to catch up with the man, not wanting to be left behind as the former assassin led the way. James blended into the crowd of people with ease after years of experience, he knew how to hide in plain sight. Anna, however, had no such experience and felt frantic when she realized they’d been separated. Her eyes darted around as she searched for her soldier. She couldn’t help but sigh in relief when he slipped back to her side and wrapped an arm around her waist as he whispered in her ear, 

“Stay close to me. Head down.” 

The Smithsonian Museum of American History bustled with people as visitors from all over the world filed in to view its various exhibits. Most of their fellow patrons milled about without much urgency. However, Anna and James couldn’t afford to dillydally. The longer they lingered here the more they risked being spotted. The woman still wasn’t thrilled they were back in the city which had brought them so much pain. But she knew she had to trust James, whatever he needed to see she knew was here.

It wasn’t long before she heard the music. ‘The Star Spangled Man With A Plan’ was a jingle any American would recognize, Captain America’s theme song was as iconic as the man himself. She should’ve known he’d come here. The Howling Commandos exhibit was a like opening a photo album from James’ past. The man pulled her in circles as he looked around the layout. Which displayed the uniforms from all the members of the team, including James Buchanan Barnes, Steve Rogers’ best friend.

While the man beside her stared, catatonically at the exhibit before them, Anna turned her attention to the image of his face pictured in a larger than life mural of the Commandos, right next to The Man himself. She felt James’ arm slip from around her and turned to see him walking toward his own memorial. Anna didn’t need to look in his mind to see that he was struggling, trying to remember, anything and everything. Feeling as though this James Barnes was another person entirely but knowing that it was him. Slowly, she stepped forward to stand next to him. His jaw was set as he stared, intently as the voice over spoke of who James Barnes was. Anna looked down to see his hand clenched in a fist. Cautiously, she reached out and brushed her fingers against his, he pulled away sharply hands going into his pockets. When she looked back up his intensely blue eyes were boring into her chocolate ones. 

“Till the end of the line.” He whispered.

“What?” She asked curiously.

“That’s what he said to me. ‘I’m with you to the end of the line.’” 

Anna smiled, sadly up at the man, “You might not remember much, but the two of you had a pretty great friendship.” He grunted and tried to wave her off, but Anna was going to let him downplay what this really meant. “When I was taken, no one cared. No one stopped by no one tried to find me, they just stopped caring, but you two, you guys are the real deal huh.” She said a bitter smile on her face. 

“Let’s get out of here.” He said, stopping the conversation from going any further.

Sighing, Anna followed the super soldier out of the museum and away from his past. She knew he wasn’t truly leaving those memories behind, he was just too overwhelmed to face them at the moment. Someday, he’d be able to accept both his past as ‘Bucky’, what he’d done as the Winter Soldier, and the possibility that he could find his humanity again. But that day wasn’t right then, it probably wasn’t something that was going to happen overnight either. Years of conditioning would take ages to heal and there was a possibility he might never recover. But as long as he was willing to work to find himself again, Anna was going to be there for him. Every step of the way, she’d help him however she could, she owed it to him after everything he’d done for her.


	6. The Bond

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anna and James get to know one another.

Chapter Six: The Bond

 

Darkness loomed in the Canadian sky when Anna and James stopped for the night in an abandoned house just north of the border somewhere near Niagara Falls. For two weeks, the pair had been on the road as they took the long way North, avoiding any major roads and larger cities. Thus far they’d done a fairly decent job drawing attention to themselves. They’d gotten this far after all.

Once they’d secured their residence for the night, Anna claimed the worn, moth-eaten floral couch in the living room ready to relax for the evening. Even without her powers, she sensed the super soldier brooding. His silhouette, merely, an outline in the moonlight as he sat, ridgedly an armchair not too far away from her position.

“You know I could help you if you want.” Anna offered, quietly through the darkness as she angled her body to face him more, “You know... with your memories.” 

The assassin didn’t respond, either ignoring her or too lost in thought to even notice she’d spoken to him. Knowing James, Anna was fairly certain it was the latter. Since she’d known him there were times when he’d get this way, unresponsive and sullen. She often wondered if he knew where or what he was doing during those silent times. Nonetheless, she was concerned for the man and recognized his continued struggle.  
Sitting up Anna felt tempted to reach out to him, but refrained instead calling, “James?”

 

He tensed at the sound of his name as if he hadn’t been expecting her voice to filter in past his thoughts before he turned his head so that she only saw his profile. 

“Get some sleep, we have a lot to do tomorrow.” His words were soft as he held her gaze before glancing back out of the window. 

As much as Anna knew her body required sleep, she didn’t want to. Sleep only brought with it nightmares she didn’t want to face. 

“You could use some yourself.” She grumbled darkly glaring at her companion.  
In response, the super soldier grunted, “I don’t need sleep.”

“You’re a human being, you need sleep.” 

He scoffed and gave no more response as though not believing her words. His tone caused the brunette to frown as she looked at the back of his head in confusion, “What?” 

“If you still think I’m human, you’re delusional.” He muttered, sounding almost sad. 

 

“You forget that I’ve been inside your head. I know you’re human.” She reminded him, knowing full well that he’d continue to ignore the fact and not respond. So the young woman pushed on, offering once again, “At least let me try. What’s the worst that could happen?”

“I could kill you.”

The tone of the room shifted dangerously under the assassin’s words as if he truly could intend to hurt her even now. After everything. Yet Anna saw through his bluff as a certain smugness settled in her chest as she gloated, “But you won’t, thanks to my father.”

“Why do you even want to help me?” Bucky was at a loss, her motives still unclear to him. 

She looked at him in confusion, frowning as if there it was the most logical thing on the planet, “Why wouldn’t I?” 

“Because I’m a monster. A machine. I’ve killed people. I found you and your mother, I led them straight to you.” He listed off, rage and defeat filling every word.

“I told you before how I feel about that. Now let me in so I can help you.” Determination boiled up inside of her as the desire to bring Bucky back to the surface burned inside her. Anna believed he deserved to be in control of his own mind and wasn’t going to let anyone, even him stop her.

“Can you choose what you see?” His question was small and soft, filled with uncertainty.   
Anna shrugged, awkwardly, “Sort of… I mean, normally, it’s kind of like a file cabinet of movies that’s been put in chronological order; but with you they really wanted you to forget so it’s almost like I’m searching for fossils in a desert. The past is still there. It’s just buried and more of an imprint than the real thing.”

“I know you’ve done it before, seen who I was before the war, but can you see me without seeing the soldier?” He asked nervous, almost scared. 

“Do you want me to try?” He was quiet for a long time. Just staring out the window. 

 

“Do it.” He urged, unable to look at her. 

Hesitating for a moment before closing her eyes, Anna dove into his mind as gently as she could. She felt him flinch as she wandered through the darkness searching for memories. The ones of their escape were at the forefront of his mind and easily passed by. Soon the flashes slowed until they were almost nonexistent. Soon she saw one, she pressed in on it. Suddenly, she was in Brooklyn in the 1940’s 

The streets were gray, the sun barely peeking through the clouds as James Barnes strutted down the street looking for his best friend. He knew Steve as well as he knew himself. He was gonna be at a recruiting office or the theater. He knew he was in the right place when when he heard a scuffle in an alleyway. Rounding the corner he saw his best friend, his Stevie getting knocked into a set of garbage cans. “Hey.” James shouted, pulling the unknown assailant off of his small friend. “Pick on somebody your own size.” The man swung, but James dodged, a confidant air to his movements as he stepped forward and swung catching him the man in the jaw, before kicking him out of the alley. 

Anna pulled away and looked at James. “I knew he was too big.” She allowed herself a small smile at his words. 

 

“Yeah?” She asked, softly. 

The man nodded, looking up at her, turning away from the window. “Why can I only remember when I’m with you?” There was a vulnerability in his voice as he kept his eyes on her. He was scared of something… But what?

She looked down at her hands twisting her fingers, “I think that whatever my dad did sort of forced a bond on us. I remember so much more of your memories than anyone else’s. It’s almost like I save them, like once I see them they’re permanent. Sometimes I can see your memories in my dreams, like I’m finding you without even trying. I don’t really know how to explain it.” 

“I don’t want you to see all that I’ve done.” He stated softly, running a hand through his brown locks.

“I already have.” Anna shook her head as she tried to find a way to reassure him that she didn’t think less of him. 

“Then why are you still here?” 

Blinking, she was taken aback by his question and inquired back, in confusion, “What do you mean?”

“How can you be here with me... after knowing what I’ve done?” James was completely unaware of how important he was to her. How she would be dead without him. How deep down he was a decent person, he had protected and defended her even before her father stepped in to meddle. He was her only safe haven.

“Because-” She began, only for pure agony to fill her and cut her off. Pulses of electric current surged through her. Wave after wave caused her muscles to spasm her body was rendered useless falling to the floor as pain exploded in her brain and screams tore at her throat. She squeezed her eyes shut to try to reduce the spots now swarming her vision. She could pay no attention to the world around her as James fought off their assailants. He stood over her striking down all those who entered the small room. When the last body fell James ran to her side. She lay writhing on the filthy floor screaming through the pain. 

“What do I do?” He screamed at her. The pain was becoming too much she began seizing, leaving James in a panic. Frantically he searched through the bodies lying on the floor. Finally, locating the remote and smashing it. Her screams quieted, but the seizures convulsing her body continued. Frightened, he knelt beside her holding her close, watching as her eyes rolled back in her head. After a what felt like an eternity to James, she calmed down, but refused to open her eyes, the pain still pumping throughout her body. 

“Anna, can you hear me?” He asked, gently pushing the hair out of her face, running his hand over her cheek. His hands were shaking as he cradled her close to himself. Flashes of distant memories assaulted his mind and he tightened his grip on her. Siberia, the chair, all of his screams as he was subjected to the mind wipes. He fought to shake the broken memories from his mind. He had to leave those memories behind, he had to get you out. 

Quickly he stood, his current mission on his mind. With his metal arm holding Anna steady, his grip on her tightened with each ragged breath as he began to gather the discarded weapons from the corpses of the Hydra agents that littered the room. Stuffing them quickly into a bag, he cast one last glance around the blood stained walls before dashing out of the house towards the car which they’d hidden behind the building. Moving quickly as he could, he buckled Anna in and threw the weapons in the trunk before getting in the vehicle himself. Anna let out a small groan as James started the car and sped down the road.

“Hey, can you hear me?” He inquired once more, receiving a mere grunted in response from his companion. “Come on, doll, you gotta talk to me.” He heard a huff and glanced over at her. A small smirk turned up in the corner of her mouth and her eyes fluttered open. 

“You laughing at me?” He asked, coming to the realization.

“You just called me doll.” She whispered, cringing as she grabbed her head. 

“That’s what you’re focusing on?” He snapped back, annoyed although he couldn’t deny the relief melting away the weight that had been crushing his chest. 

 

“Yeah. I like it.”

 

Sighing, he leaned back in the driver seat, absently running a hand down his face, “Kid, you’re gonna be the death of me.”

 

“Don’t call me kid, old man.” 

 

Glancing at each other, both parties grinned as the moonlight illuminated their faces. He rolled his eyes at her and focused back on the road. Fighting through her headache, Anna couldn’t look away from him, the man seemed to glow in the pale light and the ghost of a smirk crept its way onto his face. She doubted he even realized that he was smiling. Slowly, she reached her hand out and grazed his arm. He flinched away as she knew he would. But it got his attention. 

 

“Thank you.” 

 

“For what?” He asked, raising a single eyebrow.

 

“For fighting for me.” Anna looked down at her hands folded in her lap briefly before looking back into his steel blue eyes that held emotions that the winter soldier could never be capable of feeling.

 

“I told you, I won’t let them touch you, ever again.” 

 

“I wish I could forget.” She spoke softly, but the super soldier heard it anyway.

 

“I wish I could remember.” He responded, his hands flexing on the steering wheel. 

 

She let out a breathy laugh. “We’re quite the pair aren’t we?” He grunted in affirmation.   
“I feel like I’m taking advantage of you.” He quirked that brow again, “You’re doing everything for me, and I’m not doing shit for you.”

 

“The fuck you aren’t,” It was her turn to raise her eyebrows, “I’d still be a machine without you. You brought back James Barnes, I didn’t.” 

 

“I’ll make you a deal, you stick with me, and I’ll help you be James Barnes again.” He looked over at her his smirk stretching into an almost smile. 

 

“Punk.” He said a feeling of familiarity washing over him.

 

“Bitch.” Anna groaned out, glaring at him, though a small smirk still rested on her lips.

 

“You’re supposed to say jerk.” He said confused.

 

“Who made up those rules?” She inquired, teeth clenching through an aftershock.

 

“I-I don’t remember.” He said growing quiet.

 

“Don’t worry, you will.” She smiled at him. 

 

It wasn’t a quirk of her lips like all the others, but a genuine smile just for him. For a minute he was struck by how innocent she looked, despite the scars and the pain he knew she suffered, she seemed so pure and perfect to him in that moment. This girl had looked into his mind, had seen the damage that couldn’t be undone and had found a soul buried deep inside, and she wanted to save him, and he knew brainwashed or not, he would keep her safe, till the end of the line.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm relatively new to AO3, this is my first story posted here. This is also my first Marvel Universe story. Please be kind and if you must I ask that you sip your haterade in silence.


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